200+ Funny Ways to Roast Your Brother Without Starting a Fight (Savage & Hilarious)

Two siblings having a playful argument outdoors

Every brother has a talent for being annoying and lovable at the same time — and that’s exactly why brother roasts exist. If you’re hunting for the perfect roast your brother line, a batch of funny brother insults for the group chat, or some genuinely savage roasts for brother that still land as playful, this list has you covered.

Good sibling banter isn’t about tearing someone down. It’s about brother roast jokes that make everyone — including him — laugh out loud. Below you’ll find brother comeback jokes, roast texts for brother, and every category of harmless brother roasts you could need, whether he’s older, younger, lazy, or glued to a game console.

Also read: 155+ congratulationsBetter Ways to Say

Contents hide

Table of Contents

  • Why Roasting Your Brother Is So Popular
  • How to Roast Your Brother the Right Way
  • Funny Roasts for Your Brother
  • Savage Roasts for Your Brother
  • Roasts for Your Older Brother
  • Roasts for Your Younger Brother
  • Roasts for a Lazy Brother
  • Gaming and Nerdy Brother Roasts
  • Roast Texts to Send Your Brother
  • Situational Brother Roasts
  • Bonus Sections (Rules, Delivery, Group Chats, Mistakes, Sibling Bonds)
  • Conclusion
  • FAQs

Why Roasting Your Brother Is So Popular

Roasting a sibling is basically a family tradition passed down without anyone signing up for it. It’s one of the oldest forms of sibling relationship humor, wikipediaand it survives because it works — a well-timed joke says “I know you” in a way a heartfelt speech never could.

The Psychology Behind Sibling Banter

Sibling banter isn’t random noise — it’s a genuine bonding ritual. Brothers use humor the way other people use inside jokes and shared quotes: as a private language only the two of them fully understand.

  • It builds stronger bonds.
  • It creates shared memories.
  • It improves communication.
  • It develops humor skills.
  • It strengthens family relationships.
  • It encourages playful competition.
  • It creates inside jokes worth repeating for years.
  • It reduces tension after an argument.
  • It promotes everyday laughter.
  • It builds confidence in both siblings.

How Humor Strengthens Brotherly Bonds

Humor is often the fastest route back to normal after a fight. A single roast can undo a whole afternoon of silent treatment.

  • It creates positive memories.
  • It strengthens trust.
  • It improves relationships.
  • It encourages open communication.
  • It builds emotional connection.
  • It reduces ongoing conflicts.
  • It promotes mutual understanding.
  • It creates fun family traditions.
  • It improves overall family dynamics.
  • It makes siblings feel closer, not further apart.

The Difference Between Teasing and Bullying

Every list of brother roast lines should come with this warning label first: teasing and bullying are not the same thing, and mixing them up ruins the fun for everyone.

  • Teasing is playful; bullying is hurtful.
  • Teasing creates laughter; bullying creates pain.
  • Teasing respects boundaries; bullying ignores feelings.
  • Teasing strengthens relationships; bullying damages trust.
  • Teasing includes mutual fun; bullying is one-sided.

Why Brothers Roast Each Other So Much

Brothers often say “I love you” through insults instead of sentences — it’s simply how the relationship is wired.

  • It’s part of sibling culture.
  • It creates built-in entertainment.
  • It encourages creativity under pressure.
  • It becomes a family tradition worth quoting later.
  • It creates memorable, retellable moments.
  • It develops quick wit.
  • It keeps everyday conversations fun.
  • It strengthens friendship between siblings.
  • It encourages confidence in both directions.
  • It’s simply enjoyable, even when you lose the exchange.

How to Roast Your Brother the Right Way

There’s a real skill to the best ways to roast your brother — it’s less about the insult and more about reading the moment correctly.

Knowing His Humor Level First

Before you fire off any brother roast jokes, figure out what kind of humor he actually enjoys. Some brothers want savage; others want soft and silly.

  • Know his personality.
  • Respect his limits.
  • Consider his current mood.
  • Avoid sensitive topics entirely.
  • Read the situation before speaking.
  • Keep the tone friendly.
  • Understand his personal humor style.
  • Stay playful, not pointed.
  • Avoid personal insecurities.
  • Focus on fun over “winning.”

Keeping It Funny Instead of Mean

The whole point of funny brother insults is laughter, not a bruised ego.

  • Focus on habits, not character.
  • Avoid personal attacks.
  • Use exaggeration for effect.
  • Stay creative instead of repetitive.
  • Make it feel playful.
  • Avoid genuinely serious topics.
  • Keep smiling while you deliver it.
  • Include yourself in the joke sometimes.
  • Don’t overdo it — one good line beats five weak ones.
  • End the exchange with laughter, not silence.

Timing Your Roast Perfectly

Even the funniest brother roast jokes flop if the timing is wrong.

  • Wait for the right moment.
  • Read the room first.
  • Avoid serious or stressful situations.
  • Use natural conversational openings.
  • Don’t interrupt anything important.
  • Build a little anticipation.
  • Deliver the line with confidence.
  • Let the joke breathe before moving on.
  • Don’t over-explain the punchline.
  • Move on right after the laugh.

Using Inside Jokes for Maximum Impact

Inside jokes turn generic brother roast lines into something personal, which is always funnier.

  • Reference old family memories.
  • Mention his funniest mistakes.
  • Use classic family stories.
  • Recall childhood moments.
  • Bring up long-running habits.
  • Mention shared experiences only you two know.
  • Use old family nicknames.
  • Reference embarrassing old photos.
  • Recall specific embarrassing moments.
  • Keep every reference relatable to him specifically.

Funny Roasts for Your Brother

These are the safest, most versatile funny sibling roasts — perfect for almost any occasion.

Classic Brother One-Liners

Short, quotable, and easy to reuse — these brother one-liners are the backbone of good sibling banter.

  1. You’re proof that Wi-Fi signals can have siblings.
  2. Mom kept the receipt just in case.
  3. You’re the reason warning labels exist.
  4. You’re my favorite mistake the family made.
  5. If laziness were a sport, you’d still be too lazy to compete.
  6. You have something on your chin — another snack.
  7. You’re the spare character in the family storyline.
  8. You make Mondays look exciting by comparison.
  9. You’re living proof that miracles happen.
  10. You’re basically the family’s beta version.

Everyday Funny Comebacks

Perfect brother comeback jokes for casual arguments and everyday teasing.

  1. I’d explain it, but you still struggle with basic instructions.
  2. You’re like a software update — always showing up at the worst time.
  3. You talk a lot for someone who knows so little.
  4. Even a search engine would struggle to answer your questions.
  5. Your confidence is impressive considering the evidence.
  6. You bring chaos wherever you go.
  7. You’re the human version of a typo.
  8. You’re always one step behind reality.
  9. You make simple tasks look impossible.
  10. You’re a full-time comedian without even realizing it.

Family-Friendly Brother Roasts

Clean roast jokes that work at the dinner table, around grandparents, or with younger siblings watching.

  1. You’re the king of unfinished chores.
  2. You could lose a race to a turtle.
  3. Your room deserves its own weather forecast.
  4. You turn simple jobs into full adventures.
  5. You’re allergic to cleaning.
  6. You make procrastination look professional.
  7. You’re basically a snack expert.
  8. Your memory takes more vacation days than you do.
  9. You’re surprisingly talented at doing nothing.
  10. You make chaos look effortless.

Silly Jokes That Always Work

Sometimes the silliest playful teasing lines get the biggest laughs.

  1. You’re the reason the remote is always missing.
  2. You have the energy of a sleepy potato.
  3. Your spirit animal is a loading screen.
  4. You’re a professional nap consultant.
  5. Your superpower is disappearing during chores.
  6. You’re sponsored by excuses.
  7. You make turtles look productive.
  8. You’re the CEO of doing things later.
  9. You have Olympic-level procrastination skills.
  10. Your daily schedule is mostly buffering.

Savage Roasts for Your Brother

Savage roasts for brother work best when they’re funny first, savage second — the goal is a laugh, not a grudge. These land especially well when he starts the roast battle himself.

Confident Roast Lines

Direct, punchy, and packed with attitude.

  1. You’re living proof that confidence doesn’t require talent.
  2. You talk like a winner and perform like a loading screen.
  3. If overconfidence were a job, you’d be CEO.
  4. You act like the main character of your own documentary.
  5. Your confidence honestly deserves an award.
  6. You’re the only person who can lose an argument they started.
  7. You have main-character energy with side-character results.
  8. You make bad decisions look effortless.
  9. You’re always ready to speak, never ready to think first.
  10. Your confidence should be studied by scientists.

Savage but Harmless Comebacks

These stay funny while never crossing personal boundaries.

  1. You’re the reason family group chats have mute options.
  2. If excuses burned calories, you’d be an athlete.
  3. You’re a limited-edition problem.
  4. You make simple things complicated for entertainment.
  5. You’re the human version of buffering.
  6. You could start an argument in an empty room.
  7. You’re talented at being unavailable during chores.
  8. You somehow lose things while standing still.
  9. You make bad timing look intentional.
  10. You’re a one-person chaos department.

Ego-Crushing Funny Jokes

These funny brother insults target harmless habits, not sensitive nerves.

  1. Your biggest fan is you.
  2. You take confidence to unrealistic levels.
  3. You’re the only expert with zero experience.
  4. You celebrate participation trophies like championships.
  5. You think every idea deserves applause.
  6. You make mistakes with real enthusiasm.
  7. You talk like you’ve already won.
  8. You have a PhD in overestimating yourself.
  9. Your ego arrives before you do.
  10. You inspire confidence in everyone except yourself.

Roast Responses When He Starts It

Quick roast comeback responses for when he throws the first line.

  1. That’s cute coming from you.
  2. Did you practice that one in the mirror?
  3. You spent all day preparing that?
  4. Is that your final answer?
  5. Keep going, you’re entertaining everyone.
  6. I expected better from you, honestly.
  7. Nice try, amateur.
  8. That roast needs a software update.
  9. You’re roasting on low battery.
  10. I’ll give you one more attempt.

Roasts for Your Older Brother

Older brother roasts are all about age jokes, unearned authority, and the classic “back in my day” attitude.

Funny Age-Related Roasts

  1. Did dinosaurs ask for your advice too?
  2. You remember when Wi-Fi was invented, right?
  3. Your childhood belongs in a museum.
  4. You treat every story like a history lesson.
  5. You’ve survived three whole technological eras.
  6. Your birth certificate is basically a historical document.
  7. You still call modern technology “new.”
  8. You remember the invention of color TV.
  9. Every story starts with “back in my day.”
  10. Your age comes with bonus nostalgia.

Big Brother Authority Jokes

  1. Nobody voted you team captain.
  2. You’re not the family CEO.
  3. You act like you own shares in the house.
  4. Your authority expires at bedtime.
  5. You’re the self-appointed supervisor.
  6. Nobody requested your leadership.
  7. You manage problems you personally created.
  8. You take sibling management far too seriously.
  9. You’re head of the unnecessary advice department.
  10. Your leadership has zero actual followers.

“Back in My Day” Roasts

  1. Here comes another history lecture.
  2. We know, life was harder in 2012.
  3. Not every story needs a flashback.
  4. You make every conversation educational.
  5. Your nostalgia has its own nostalgia.
  6. You’re powered entirely by old memories.
  7. Every joke turns into a documentary.
  8. You miss things that happened yesterday.
  9. You act like smartphones are futuristic.
  10. Your favorite hobby is remembering.

Older Brother Reality Checks

  1. Older doesn’t always mean smarter.
  2. Experience isn’t helping much here.
  3. You’ve just had more time to make mistakes.
  4. You’re proof that age is just a number.
  5. Time invested doesn’t guarantee success.
  6. You had a head start and still tied.
  7. You’ve practiced longer, not better.
  8. You’re experienced at learning lessons the hard way.
  9. Seniority isn’t everything.
  10. Wisdom is still processing, apparently.

Roasts for Your Younger Brother

Younger brother roasts focus on chaotic energy, immaturity, and habits only a little sibling could master.

Annoying Little Brother Roasts

  1. You were born to interrupt conversations.
  2. You have expert-level annoyance skills.
  3. Your timing is always terrible.
  4. You treat every room like a playground.
  5. You have unlimited energy and zero direction.
  6. You’re a professional distraction.
  7. You appear whenever chaos is needed.
  8. You’re always nearby when trouble starts.
  9. You have a real talent for bad ideas.
  10. You never miss a chance to be annoying.

Funny Immaturity Jokes

  1. You’re emotionally sponsored by cartoons.
  2. You make maturity look optional.
  3. You still argue like it’s recess.
  4. Your logic needs parental supervision.
  5. You think volume wins debates.
  6. Your attention span has vacation plans.
  7. You’re still stuck in tutorial mode.
  8. Growing up remains entirely optional for you.
  9. You treat responsibilities like rumors.
  10. Your maturity level is still loading.

Playful Little Brother Burns

  1. You’re the family side quest.
  2. You’re everyone’s favorite inconvenience.
  3. You create extra work for everyone around you.
  4. You’re a surprise challenge every single day.
  5. You make life unpredictable.
  6. You’re a walking plot twist.
  7. You have endless confidence and limited planning.
  8. You bring energy, not solutions.
  9. You’re a professional button-pusher.
  10. You’re the chaos upgrade pack nobody asked for.

Cute but Savage Comebacks

  1. You’re lucky you’re adorable.
  2. Your survival skills genuinely impress me.
  3. You somehow make mistakes look cute.
  4. You’re impossible not to tease.
  5. You bring joy and confusion in equal measure.
  6. You’re a lovable disaster.
  7. You’re everyone’s favorite headache.
  8. You turn simple tasks into full adventures.
  9. You’re too funny to stay mad at.
  10. You’re chaos wrapped in confidence.

Roasts for a Lazy Brother

Lazy brother jokes are a fan favorite because almost every family has one sibling who treats relaxing like a full-time career.

Sleeping All Day Roasts

  1. Your bed misses you when you’re gone.
  2. Sleeping is your favorite hobby.
  3. You’re basically training for a nap marathon.
  4. You treat waking up like a personal challenge.
  5. You’re sponsored by pillows.
  6. Your alarm clock gave up on you years ago.
  7. You consider naps productive.
  8. You sleep like it’s a competitive sport.
  9. Your bed should honestly pay rent.
  10. You’re a professional sleeper.

Couch Potato Brother Jokes

  1. That couch knows you better than we do.
  2. You and the couch are in a serious relationship.
  3. The sofa basically filed for joint custody.
  4. You have reserved parking on the couch.
  5. You’re the furniture’s favorite customer.
  6. The couch misses you during vacations.
  7. You leave permanent impressions behind.
  8. You should pay couch rent at this point.
  9. The sofa recognizes your exact schedule.
  10. You’re basically part of the living room decor.

No Motivation Comebacks

  1. Motivation blocked your number.
  2. Effort and you aren’t on speaking terms.
  3. You avoid work professionally.
  4. Productivity fears your influence.
  5. You’re anti-hustle by nature.
  6. Ambition took a day off and never returned.
  7. You treat effort like a subscription service.
  8. Your goals are always postponed.
  9. You’re basically a procrastination influencer.
  10. You inspire relaxation in everyone nearby.

Productivity Roast Lines

  1. You have unfinished projects from childhood.
  2. Your to-do list reads like historical fiction.
  3. Productivity sees you and runs away.
  4. You plan more than you actually do.
  5. Your schedule is mostly postponements.
  6. You move at buffering speed.
  7. Deadlines fear disappointment from you.
  8. Your work ethic is in airplane mode.
  9. You specialize in “later.”
  10. You’re the king of unfinished business.

Gaming and Nerdy Brother Roasts

Gaming brother roasts and nerdy brother jokes are perfect for the sibling who spends more time online than in the real world.

Gamer Brother Comebacks

  1. You have more game achievements than real ones.
  2. Your social life is mostly loading screens.
  3. You’ve touched every controller except responsibility.
  4. You know game maps better than your own neighborhood.
  5. Your keyboard gets more attention than your family.
  6. You’re level 100 at avoiding chores.
  7. Your headset is basically your real personality.
  8. You’ve spent more time respawning than succeeding.
  9. You treat games like full-time employment.
  10. Your character has a brighter future than you do.

Mobile Gaming Addiction Roasts

  1. Your battery works harder than you do.
  2. Your phone knows your fingerprints better than your family does.
  3. You panic more at 1% battery than during exams.
  4. Your screen time deserves its own award.
  5. You treat charging cables like life support.
  6. Your thumbs are the most athletic part of your body.
  7. You spend more time online than actually awake.
  8. You could navigate game maps blindfolded.
  9. Your phone has seen more of your face than the mirror has.
  10. You’d lose Wi-Fi and forget how to function.

Nerdy Brother Jokes

  1. You correct people for fun.
  2. You treat every conversation like a quiz show.
  3. You know everything except when to stop talking.
  4. Your hobbies come with footnotes.
  5. You explain jokes instead of laughing at them.
  6. You’re basically a walking search engine.
  7. Your favorite workout is carrying books.
  8. You argue with facts nobody asked for.
  9. You make simple questions complicated.
  10. Your fun facts aren’t always that fun.

Tech Genius Roast Lines

  1. You break things just to fix them.
  2. You restart everything except your attitude.
  3. You’re IT support nobody requested.
  4. You talk to computers more than people.
  5. You think every problem needs an update.
  6. Your solutions create brand new problems.
  7. You act like Wi-Fi is a personality trait.
  8. You’re one password away from disaster.
  9. Every repair takes three YouTube tutorials.
  10. You think turning it off and on is deep wisdom.

Roast Texts to Send Your Brother

Roast texts for brother are perfect for messages, family group chats, and social media captions — quick, funny, and easy to fire off.

Short Roast Text Messages

  1. Still undefeated at doing nothing.
  2. Your couch misses you.
  3. Stay humble, you’re not that famous.
  4. Congratulations on another unproductive day.
  5. You’re a limited-edition problem.
  6. Your fan club is just you.
  7. Nice confidence. Wrong evidence.
  8. Keep dreaming, superstar.
  9. The family is still recovering from your ideas.
  10. You’re trending in the chaos category.

Group Chat Brother Roasts

  1. Breaking news: he finally cleaned something.
  2. Somebody congratulate him for waking up.
  3. The family disappointment has joined the chat.
  4. He’s typing… probably another bad idea.
  5. We found the missing remote — it was under him.
  6. The legend of unfinished chores continues.
  7. Group chat security has officially been compromised.
  8. Please ignore his confidence.
  9. Somebody update his software.
  10. Another day, another excuse.

Emoji-Based Roast Texts

  1. 🛏️👑 = Your life story.
  2. 📱🔋❤️ = Your true relationship.
  3. 🦥🏆 = Employee of the month.
  4. 🎮🍕😴 = Daily schedule.
  5. 🤡📢 = Public speaking expert.
  6. 🐢⚡ = Your productivity speed.
  7. 📺🛋️ = Dream career.
  8. 🙄🏅 = Professional annoyance.
  9. 📉🧠 = System update needed.
  10. 🚫🧹 = Chore allergy detected.

Social Media Caption Roasts

  1. Family photo featuring the backup sibling.
  2. Living proof that miracles happen.
  3. Still waiting for his glow-up.
  4. My parents’ funniest experiment.
  5. The reason group projects fail.
  6. World’s most confident underachiever.
  7. He came with extra bugs.
  8. Family-approved troublemaker.
  9. The human loading screen.
  10. Raising family stress levels since birth.

Situational Brother Roasts

Situational brother roasts target specific behaviors in the moment — and they tend to get the biggest reactions because they feel so personal.

When He’s Acting Smart

  1. One search changed your whole personality.
  2. You’re acting like you invented the internet.
  3. Congratulations on your temporary intelligence.
  4. Your confidence grew faster than your knowledge.
  5. You learned one fact and started a TED Talk.
  6. Calm down, Einstein.
  7. You’re not a genius, just loud.
  8. Your expertise has a very short history.
  9. That’s a lot of confidence for one fact.
  10. Please save some intelligence for the rest of us.

When He’s Being Cringe

  1. Even your reflection feels awkward right now.
  2. The cringe is strong today.
  3. You’re making everyone uncomfortable professionally.
  4. That joke needed adult supervision.
  5. You missed the funny part completely.
  6. Your confidence survived another bad idea.
  7. The second-hand embarrassment is real.
  8. You’re creating new levels of awkward.
  9. Please stop helping.
  10. Your personality is buffering again.

When He’s Bragging Too Much

  1. Tell us again, we almost cared.
  2. Your biggest fan is speaking.
  3. The self-promotion never ends.
  4. Humility left the chat.
  5. You deserve an award for talking about yourself.
  6. The ego has officially entered the building.
  7. That’s impressive — according to you.
  8. We heard you the first five times.
  9. Your confidence is exhausting.
  10. Please continue your autobiography.

When He Gets Caught Lying

  1. That lie had no chance.
  2. You should’ve rehearsed that.
  3. Even the dog knew you were lying.
  4. Nice story, needs better writers.
  5. Your face gave it away immediately.
  6. The truth arrived before your excuse did.
  7. You’re bad at lying and worse at hiding it.
  8. That explanation created more questions.
  9. Nobody believed that, including you.
  10. Better luck next time, detective.

Bonus Section 1: Brother Roast Rules Everyone Should Know

Why Respect Always Comes First

Respect is what separates a great roast from a genuine insult — keep it lighthearted, honor his limits, and remember the whole point is fun.

Do You Know When a Roast Goes Too Far

A roast crosses the line the moment it targets real insecurities instead of habits — watch his reaction closely and know when to stop.

What Makes a Roast Funny Instead of Hurtful

Good roasts stay focused on behavior and everyday moments, use exaggeration instead of accusation, and keep the whole mood playful from start to finish.

Bonus Section 2: The Art of Delivering a Great Roast

Timing Is Everything

A perfectly timed roast often lands harder than the joke itself — wait for the right moment, read the room, and let it happen naturally.

How Can Tone Make a Roast Better

The exact same line can sound funny or mean depending purely on delivery — smile, stay relaxed, and never let it sound angry.

What Makes a Roast Memorable

The best brother roast lines are original, specific, short, and easy to quote back later.

Bonus Section 3: Group Chat Roast Strategies

Funny Family Group Chat Moments

Family chats are basically a stage for group chat roasts — celebrate funny mistakes, pull from old family stories, and keep everyone laughing together.

How to Win a Roast Battle Online

Winning a roast battle isn’t about being mean, it’s about staying creative, staying confident, and never overreacting to a comeback.

What Replies Get the Biggest Laughs

Quick comebacks, relatable jokes, and unexpected punchlines consistently beat long, over-explained ones.

Bonus Section 4: Mistakes to Avoid While Roasting

Using Sensitive Topics

Certain subjects should never become roast material — avoid insecurities, personal struggles, and real family conflicts.

Why Repeating the Same Joke Gets Old

Even the best brother roast jokes lose their punch with overuse — keep the material fresh and add new lines regularly.

What Can Turn Fun Into Drama

Poor timing and bad judgment can flip a fun exchange into real tension fast — don’t force a joke, don’t target emotions, and know when the moment has passed.

Bonus Section 5: Building Better Sibling Bonds Through Humor

Why Shared Laughter Matters

Shared laughter builds trust, creates connection, and strengthens the family bond in a way few other things can.

How Funny Memories Strengthen Relationships

The funniest moments often become the stories siblings retell for decades — encouraging connection and building stronger friendships along the way.

What Makes Brother Banter So Special

Brother banter blends affection, competition, and humor into something uniquely personal, memorable, and deeply part of sibling culture.

Conclusion

The best ways to roast your brother always combine humor, creativity, and respect. Whether you’re pulling from funny roasts for your brother, going full savage roasts for brother, sending quick roast texts for brother, or keeping things strictly family-friendly roasts, the goal never changes — laughter over hurt feelings. Great sibling banter builds memorable moments, strengthens the relationship, and gives brothers their own unique way of showing affection. Stick to harmless brother roasts, sharp brother comeback jokes, and genuinely playful teasing lines, and you’ll always have the perfect response ready — without ever starting a real fight.

FAQs

What are the best funny roasts for your brother?

The best funny roasts focus on habits, hobbies, and everyday situations rather than personal insecurities. Playful one-liners and light sibling banter usually work best.

How do I roast my brother without hurting his feelings?

Keep the jokes lighthearted, avoid sensitive topics, and focus on making everyone laugh — including your brother.

What should I avoid when roasting my brother?

Avoid topics related to appearance, personal struggles, insecurities, family problems, or anything that could genuinely upset him.

Are savage brother roasts okay?

Yes, as long as they’re funny, harmless, and used in a playful context where both siblings clearly understand it’s a joke.

What are some good roast texts to send a brother? Short roast texts like “Your couch misses you” or “Congratulations on another unproductive day” are funny, simple, and effective.

Why do brothers roast each other so much? Roasting is often a form of sibling bonding. It creates shared memories, inside jokes, and a unique way of showing affection through humor.

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